Who You Calling ‘Hideous’?
So, I’d been planning on doing a post about the way women’s appearance has played into the Olympics, then a funny little thing happened this morning. I got up at 6am, hauled on my running kit & booked it outside to do a hill session. After my sets, I came back in and took a shot of my sweaty, distressed face for Instagram. Why? Well, for one, because I run a fitness site and secondly because I’m documenting all my training in the run up to the Amsterdam Half Marathon. Within minutes, a kind lady user of Instagram had posted the following comment: ‘Holy Jesus, you’re hideous.’ And this, feeds in to the entire point I was going to make about women at the Olympics anyway, so I must thank that user for both her rudeness and her impeccable timing.
Now, to be fair, I’ll be the first to admit, the picture is hardly flattering and I’ll also admit, I ain’t exactly a looker. Trust me, this is not a fishing for compliments post – I have a weird face, it’s my lot in life. I’ve dealt with it. However, I challenge anyone to do an intense hill training session and look attractive afterwards and frankly, if I still look cute after a workout, I didn’t try hard enough (haters, feel free to insert ‘you weren’t cute to begin with’ jokes here).
I’m not particularly bothered by the insult – I’ve had much worse – but I’m bothered by what it symbolises on a grander scale. So many women are put off getting into sports because of these crazy ideals of beauty that are shoved down our throat on a daily basis. The thought of looking anything less than perfect just doesn’t compute. God forbid we look a little sweaty, get our hair a little dishevelled. And then those of us who choose to and will proudly display it, have the privilege of being called ‘hideous’ by lovely people we don’t even know on the internet.
During the Olympics, I’ve been frustrated by the amount of time spent commentating on women’s looks over their ability. Calling them ‘girls’ and remarking on their outfits and ‘oooh look at their nail art!’ all trivialises their incredible athletic ability. If there were comments flying around about how great the men’s hair looked and such like, then fine, but that’s just not the way it works. We have ‘Strong is the new sexy’ memes flying about accompanied by pictures of scantily clad muscly chicks – why can’t strong just be strong? Why does it always have to link back in to female sexuality and the male gaze?
I was really disappointed to see a number of women on Twitter referring to female shot putters, discus throwers and weight lifters as ‘masculine’ and ‘manly’. Just because you’ve bought into a stereotypical beauty ideal, don’t strip these women of their femininity. Then at the other end of the spectrum, we have the New York Times writing a scathing article about Lolo Jones, saying the only reason she made the US hurdling team is because of her stunning good looks (while the article does make some valid points about women in athletics, it is very harsh on Jones). It seems we can’t win for losing.
So what are we supposed to do? As an athletic woman, one of the great things about the Olympics for me has been the spectrum of female body shapes on show. From the bulky shot putters to the muscles of Nicola Adams and the petite frames of the gymnasts.
I’m not here to buy into your stereotypes or stupid feminine ideals. I’ve got training to do. With each mile, each sparring session and stretch I’m becoming a better me, in mind, body and most certainly, soul. I’m focused, driven, ambitious and I will damn sure defend any woman getting out there and devoting herself to a healthier life. So here’s to us, the ‘hideous’, the misfits, the up-at-6am-ers, the sweaty, messy, muscly, 6-packed, DOMS-suffering divas of the road, gym and stadium. Thank goodness there are some of us out there who are showing women how to be unafraid to be the very best they damn well can be – screw your judgement.
Be pretty on rest days.
You can follow me on Instagram @BangsandaBun
This post can also be seen on my other site Bangs and a Bun
Well said! It’s always one of the reasons I hear for people not exercising and it frustrates me. Once you’ve done your first mile you really don’t care what you look like and if anyone else does, well they can eat your dust really can’t they!
I love this post. I love the pic of you. And I love, love, love that you are one of the few women online who posts HONEST photographs of herself, not Photoshopped posed pouting shots fully styled and made-up with fake ‘self-deprecating’ captions designed to elict endless ‘OMG hun you look STUNNING’ comments from followers.
I look ‘hideous’ after training too and I can’t even begin to care. I also look scruffy 99% of the time whilst I’m busy working as a writer, looking after my daughter and training for a half-marathon. Dude, I don’t have TIME to be pretty!
If you look pretty after training then you obviously haven’t trained hard enough.
I love looking hideous as it means I have pushed myself to my absolute limits. You only have to look at my race photos to realise that I’m not taking it easy. The phrase ‘beet root face’ has been used a number of times! I love to start off looking cute, cos well I do, but to finish cute means I need to push it up a level.
Bangs – The world clearly needs more girls like us to show the way!
Right, got to go and shower cos I stink from 2 back 2 back weights sessions. I am officially hideous right now
I feel sorry for the woman who made that comment, one because she clearly doesn’t understand the feeling of joy that comes when you throw yourself, unencumbered by self-consciousness, into a physical pursuit, and two because she’s the kind of person who tells people on the internet that they look hideous.
As the woman who, in the gym, always ended up purple in the face and dripping in sweat, and frequently found myself next to the lycra-clad nymphette who clearly worked out in private to get that body and then showed up to walk on a treadmill looking pretty and not breaking sweat so she could be seen that way, I thank you.
Best blog post I’ve read in ages.
We women are often our own worse critics but I don’t care what the Olympic athletes look like whether they turn up looking like a supermodel or like they’ve just got out of bed; I’m watching to see the performances.
Oh how I hate, hate, hate the women athletes being called girls! Not found of the men being called boys either but that happens much less often.
Great blog!
Brilliant post.
I feel that I should look hideous after a workout. Otherwise I haven’t been working. I’ve had the whole “ooo, can i watch you train that’ll be sexy” to which my reply is always “no, no, it’s not. It’s sweaty and red faced and gurning.”
The girl i started training with when i was younger spent an absolute fortune on tracksuits and trainers and used to come to the gym in a full face of slap and leave looking pretty much the same as when she walked in. I never understood the point. Although she did bed one of the trainers there, which, i guess was her point. Me, cut off old t-shirts and sweats and a whole heap of hot mess afterwards, but the point was to work hard and look good outside of that – as you say Be Pretty On Rest Days.
Sometimes it is required to look ‘presentable’ whilst you demonstrate your skills but that requires a team of makeup artists and aircon and all sorts to maintain the ‘attractive whilst active’ look, and it’s the exception, not the norm.
I’d love to see the male athletes subject to scrutiny about their hair, their looks, their jewellery etc in the same way women are. I wonder if there are any brave female commentators out there who’d give it a go…
Thank you, thank you, thank you for this brilliant post! From a tomato-headed, mega-perspiring, definitely not-cute-post-workout running chick!
Yes!!! Watching these Olympics, I was absolutely amazed and humbled by their dedication, passion, athleticism, endurance and attitude – regardless of the sport and regardless of their gender (though as a woman, watching the other female athletes was definitely a huge inspiration for me!). I saw how each person executed their sport and pushed themselves through each competition; and I thought about the staggering amount of work and obstacles each overcame to become an Olympian (not how their hair looked). And when I saw someone grimace or grunt, I said shouted “go! dig deep! push, push!” – and I will remember their faces when I need to dig deep and push harder.
The superficial people (and media) will only see the superficial: the clothes, jewelry, hair, or nails; but that is their loss, because they missed the point. I heard many of the Olympians comment that they were just thrilled to be there, to realize a dream for which they had worked so hard for so long, to give it their ALL, and to be able to compete against the best athletes from all over the world. THAT is the point!
Thank you to all the amazing women who continue to push gender boundaries to compete in the sports of their choosing; you are beautiful warriors!
Love this post! Can I extend this argument to the workplace? What’s up with women in an office putting each other down for what they’re wearing?! I was actually told once at work that I’m letting myself go because I didn’t wear enough makeup. I’m sorry–I’m ambitious, I run, I get my master’s degree at night. I don’t have time for the curling iron and eyebrow pencil (yes, that was the other criticism) every morning!
1. brilliant post! I am never really fond of finish photos.. but have learned to love them as that is what ‘giving your all’ looks like. And how I had to learn to love my own finish photos, media have to learn to love professional female athletes giving their all and looking like they look while doing just that.
2. awesome that you are running Amsterdam 1/2.. I’ll be there! Either cheering or running myself.. As you always state, you run for beer: make sure you do a post-marathon-stop at brewery ”t IJ’ to drink a ‘natte’ or ‘zatte’ (best local brewed beer in town)
Woo sorry the first link was meant to be this. Please edit that in the comments. Cheers.
I can relate to what you are saying, and it is true. For a long time I would not exercise too hard because I was afraid of messing up my hair or that I did not have enough time to get ready. The underlying issue, was that I had an eating disorder and a serious case of body dysmorphia. So living without my precious hair and makeup to hide behind, I felt so insecure.
I am now healed from my body issues, and started a company to help raise awareness to topics such as this. I currently train in Muay Thai, and trust me it is not pretty (complete with snot and spit flying out of me, grunting, and a full on purple face…haha). And you know…I feel sexier than ever. I may not look “cute” all of the time, and my hair looks like something out of a horror story most of the week (my husband calls it my lion mane)…but when I do dress up…I feel great, and look KILLER in my clothes!!! AND since I work out, I really do not have to count as many calories, and can focus on nutrients instead!
Girl, you are BEAUTIFUL, even in that sweaty post workout picture. I mean… c’mon, look at those baby blues!! You are such an inspiration and thank you for being open and honest with this blog post and picture. The more power to ya!!!
Brilliant post – love it! I take huge pride in my sweaty boob patches after a crazy lunchtime treadmill session. Up yours clean girl on the cross trainer!
In all seriousness though, there was once a girl on a cross trainer next to the treadmill I was running on. I smashed out an intense 35 minute pyramid session, while she looked on in disgust at me sweating through my t-shirt. She might have been slimmer and she might have smelled better (actually she definitely would have smelled better…), but it was me that got the compliments from the people in the weights area. Just saying…
At my running club it’s brilliant to hear new female members gradually talk less and less about how they’re ‘earning’ their dinner, and more about how damn healthy they’re feeling. I’m guilty of the old ‘earned myself a cheesecake’ talk and am so happy that running and fitness has brought not just a healthier body, but a much healthier outlook on life, myself… everything!